It was a profound experience, one that is truly difficult (almost impossible) for me to put in words.
From the moment I reached out to you and enquired, I felt I was in very good hands. From the initial consultation, the day of the journey itself and the follow up that you did, I was never uncertain that I was doing the right thing with the right guide. And I’m a sceptic of everything. You made me feel safe and comfortable despite my extreme anxiety. Your journey location was both beautiful and safe and warm.
I have suffered with diagnosed major depression, ptsd and parasomnia for over 13 years and have been on a government disability pension that whole time.
To try to relieve my symptoms, especially anxiety, I have consumed over 7 oz of cannabis per month, under a medical prescription for 9 years now and also produced (under license) my own during most of that time because of the cost of it. It made me a prisoner to my home because of the growing of it and the constant fear of theft or home invasion made me even more anxious. The benefits of the cannabis were becoming less and less, requiring me to use more and more. A totally unexpected result is that I have not consumed ANY since the “trip” and am able to function so much better than before. Including cognition. The withdrawal symptoms are essentially non existent. It’s now been 18 days and I don’t even think about it. And no cannabis “fog” which lasted for hours every morning when I was using it. I wasn’t planning to reduce or stop at all but simply haven’t felt the need to use it since the journey. I am only taking a cholesterol med and a daily low dose aspirin now.
I have been more social, much more active and actually have gone out to meet friends for coffee which I haven’t felt able to do in years. We sat and talked for 3 hours. My son and I have even gone to the driving range to hit some golf balls. Golf was a game I loved but have not played even once in 13 years so this was a big step too.
I also feel more peace from within especially regarding the moment my wife of 30 years passed away. I feel a sense of knowledge that she is okay now. I longed to be able to know that for such a long long time. Without such knowledge, I could never get any better.
While much of the journey is a blur in my consciousness, I vividly remember some things. And those things continue to bring peace into my day. I know there is a God. I felt such a profound connect to our Creator to whom I am grateful for giving me that moment in time. I remember vivid spectacular bursts of colour. And the images of spectacular shapes and patterns still have me in awe. No part of the trip made me feel fearful…. just enlightenment.
It was a beautiful life altering experience. One that I go over in my head frequently. Some things are still opening up to me. I know I cried a lot during the “trip” and I know there were moments when I felt such peace and happiness like never before. I feel somehow that the medicine knew what to do and knew what I needed even when I didn’t. I feel a connection to everything now.
Your guidance and that of grandmother mushroom have not only saved my life but enriched it beyond my hopes. I now see a future that was very uncertain before this.
I am grateful for you and thank you from the bottom of my heart for this gift. You are an Angel my friend!
In a few hours, you have done more for my mental health than all the many psychiatrists, psychologists, doctors and others I have sought help from in 13 years. They (CAMH and St Joes Mental Health Center) had recommended that I receive electric shock and magnetic treatments on my brain (I refused) and the doctors had me on over 20 different antidepressants over the years…. all of which made me further unwell.
Please feel free to share my experience with any others who seek your help if you think it would useful to them. I only wish I was better able to put my experience into words. Thanks simply doesn’t seem enough.
Cheers and God bless you, my friend.